Advice!! Guy I’m dating is obsessed with football?

[Sienna]

Hi,

I never thought I would have this dilemma but I am!! I’m 28 yrs old and I have started to date a really great guy. I mean he is lovely and sweet etc etc and I always knew that he liked football but didn’t realise how much till just now!!! I’ve been trying to book a wknd and told him to give me a few wknds that he is free. I’m trying to be a little casual because I don’t want to be too much- we’ve only just started a ‘relationship’ He tells me okay this wknd will work and then later on said oh sorry, there might be a game on let me get back to you…. I didn’t realise he meant football!!! I mean I was even trying to be all good and suggest meeting up in the evening as I KNOW that he plays footy with his local friends on a Saturday morning and I’ve always been okay with that but I didn’t know that evenings would be out too. I suddenly had a moment of complete realisation when I thought, oh dear so this is what’s it going to be like. Football season will dictate all our wknds of when we can do stuff or whether he will come out with me to parties/birthdays/wknds away. It might sound really silly I know!! Just it all fits. Him suggesting mid week meets up sometimes Friday maybe even a Sunday but he never said abt a Saturday before till I asked just now. We started our relationships over summer whilst footy was on a break so I didn’t get ‘it’. I don’t know if he gets tickets for every game so physically goes on wknds or he just goes to the pub with his friends to watch it.

I think I even know what most of you are going to say- it depends how much I like him and want to be with him…. Then I have to suck up the footy aspect and live with it. But we’ve only just started seeing one another and I just had this really funny picture of me fuming because every wknd he will be his friends for footy and I never get to plan anything unless he isn’t watching football!

Anyone else in a similar situation??

I don't mind him playing it in the mornings just as long as we can plan holidays and he is all right with missing it sometimes and I understand he would want to watch all the big games and obviously if he has tickets then he would go- I'm a bit wary that he might want to watch every single game all the time and that just means we would hardly see one another! Lol It's new and if we don't see one another then what is there to build on? He is lovely though and guess I will just see how it goes but I couldnt have someone who's passion is football one and me second. Not when there are so many other guys who won't be consumed by football.

[Empress]

The point to realise now is that he will never change - or at least you have to assume that - can you put up with it or not?

[Casee R]

I read your story and it sounds like the story of my life! I have been with my man for almost three years and I'm fed up with it. At first I didn't mind but now and I despise it and the lifestyle that goes with it. If you're already fed up with it after such a short time you should just end it because I think footy will always come before you.

[Katsumi K]

tell him how you feel and thro a football at his head make a bet with him see if he can give football up for a week or summet.. compremise?

[Simon L]

suggest him watching the highlights on match of the day instead.

[J4551]

Talk to him about it, like Katsum said, he will have to be willing to compromise otherwise he clearly isn't worth it

[jkirsten51]

So break up with him if it's that big of a deal.

Oh, and don't call it "footy." That's annoying.